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The New Mario Massacre was a terrible event led by New Mario. It started in Toad Town in July 4, 2907. The death toll was 314 Toada, 58 Koopas, and a white glove.

Pour a Little Sugar on!

On July 4, 2907, New Mario was walking in Toad Town only to find Master Hand shoot up from a canyon, holding 5 Cupcakes. Evil Guy, his creator, found the little cupcakes irrestible to destroy, commanding Master Hand to give them to him, but he refused. New Mario wanted them too, so he challenged them to breakdance for the cupcakes.

Dance Dance Evolution

Evil Guy, Master Hand, and New Mario soon started breakdancing. New Mario is great at breakdancing, so he KNEW he would win. Evil Guy had a trick up his sleeve, though. He took out a laser gun and started shooting Master Hand, which made the glove die. Evil Guy took the Cupcakes, but soon Master Hand started glowing, and creepily said "3...2...ONE." Then Toad Town and everyone in it besides New Mario and Evil Guy exploded.

Cupcake in a "Cupshell"

After the explosion, Evil Guy and New Mario hijacked the Halbeard to escape, but Toadsworth and an army of badly burned Toads soon started shooting them. Finding Awesome Guy's chainsaw called "Lucy", New Mario threw the chainsaw into the army, causing all the Toads to die. New Mario was soon arrested by Toadsworth for murder, carjacking, and being too skilled at breakdancing. Evil Guy was not charged because he knew Toadsworth's bank account number.

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