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For those without comedic tastes, the so-called "experts" at MarioWiki have a real article on The Koopalings.
Koopa

A more recent picture of the Koopalings

Holy shit, shut the actual fuck up. Goddamn, shut your whore mouth or so help me I'm going to fucking maim you and shit in your ear. I have fucking had it with these little rat bastard shits, and I want to see all of them impaled on a spike through the anus Vlad the Impaler-style. I'm going to fucking kill them all. I'm going to shoot them all in the goddamn head.
Bowser

The Koopalings are the first 7 "children" of King August'us September'us October'us November'us December'us January'us February'us March'us April'us May'us June'us July'us Koopa, they used to be in some Mario Shames that you won't care about and they haven't appeared in a game since 20 minutes from now, it is belived that Bowser Jr. overshadows them, but this is untrue since in reality, they have more fans than Waluigi, Pickle, Malleo, Nobody and Dub-ya. They claim to be haters but they are also Freaks due to their... Unusual habits.

Stuff They Did[]

Sonicman: The Black Knight[]

Strangely they first made an appearance in Sonicman: The Black Knight as recurring bosess. After they are defeated they turn into flowers. (while making a little "Poof" at it) They were later beaten up by Batman which caused them to go mad. In their first appearance they all looked like Penguins and all kept reappearing in the word "Bleooow" over and over again. This maybe because Shigeru Miyamoto's pet rat is sometimes known as Sir Bleeoow Mcfredricinson toaster Septmberous Juliacovinson III.

Cardboard Mario: The Clogged Warp Pipe[]

The Koopalings appear in this game doing strange stuff when the heroes come along and have a long and very boring battle with them. They all have the same movements and attacks and each does 29374 damage to you so Mario threw them into Milk but they somehow survived. They seemed to be made of polestyrine in the game instead of cardboard for some reason in the game. Larry didn't appear. It was revealed in a future game that he had joined forces with Wario to defeat the Haters. They were first named in this Shame.

Obey Wario, Destroy Mario! 2[]

Larry Koopa made an appearance in Obey Wario, Destroy Mario! 2 as a boss on the Haters side. He fights you in Dinosaur Land by balancing on a Giant Goomba and trying to push the player in to a huge bowl of Custard. He hates Wario because he hypnotised him to make a pantomie with a bunch of moles. He gets kicked to the moon after you use a special uber attack 500 times. After this, Bowser locked him in a cupboard with Weegee. After 67 years in suspended animation they arrived to be in another Shame...

Mario And Luigi Superstar Shmaga[]

In Mario And Luigi Superstar Shmaga, it turns out in a bizarre twist that they have sued Bowser for mistreatment and so Cackletta adopted them. But it turns out that she is even worse than Bowser so they run away. Mario and co. beat them up anyway and push them out of Bowser's giant Cookie fortress. Roy slaps you, Lemmy sacrifices himself to Satan, Wendy sits on you, Morton shoots at you, Ludwig chases after you in his pimpmobile, Iggy attempts to stab you brutally with a knife and Larry uses kung-fu. Bowser re-adopts them at the end of the story, much to their, well, disliking. Duh.

Personalities[]

There are over 517 Koopalings although 509 of them are Mini-Bowsers who like Waffles and speak with French accents. The most prominent are the eight were talking about, the 8th can be found here.

  • Larry Koopa(Cheesy)13 yrs old: If you mispronounce his nickname it sounds like "cheatsy", likes dancing and being a public menace. also making hip-hop gangsta videos most include large amounts of cussing. This retard thinks profanity is fucking funny.
  • Morton Koopa Jr. (Big Mouth)14 yrs old: Yaps on an on about stuff Nobody cares about, is the don of the Junior Mafia Association. He is in charge of a secret crack house underneath Bowser's toolshed and is wanted by the authorities.
  • Wendy O. Koopa (Cootie's Pie)14 yrs old: She is on drugs and likes to talk on the phone. She has an inappropriate style and has a secret teenager language. She always kills her brothers, but they get revived. She has an It's-a Mobiles and never uses the bathroom because it'll ruin her style. She uses my mouth instead.
  • Iggy Koopa (Jump)15 yrs old: Iggy is a homicidal murderer at age 13.57635836 and has successfully killed 5 Guys. Probably inherited his nerdiness from his dad. He has stupid hair that looks like a ten year old designing an anime character, which makes him the most cringe of the group.
  • Roy Koopa (Bull-E)15 yrs old: Roy is a girly boy. Who practises girls ballet and prances about all day in a tutu, it is hard for him to make friends because he has very intimidating muscles.
  • Lemmy Koopa (Thighs)16 yrs old: Lemmy has a long backstory, involving clouds, revival, and living in a giant popsicle. He can control the forces of darkness and is one of the true masterminds behind the Bad People. But enough about that.
  • Ludwig Von Koopa (Cookie)16 yrs old: Haters claim he is a genius, while everyone else thinks he's kinda foolish. He is known for being a notorious pimp. His hair sucks and I'm going to rape him.

Trivia[]

  • For a short while, Escargoon ate a poisonous fungi and believed he was a Koopaling until King Dedededededededededede sat on his head.
  • Lemmy is the smartest Koopaling, althrough Ludwig fanboys have tried to kill Lemmy and Iggy in order to make Ludwig the smartest.
  • Iggy and Lemmy are prone to seizures often.
  • They were sued for damage to Dolphin Island during the Battle Of Dolphin Island during the Great Koopa War.
  • Ludwig has some strange connection to Giga Bowser.
  • Lemmy sold his soul to satan
  • Bill Cipher ate a Milk so he is now occasionally a koopaling
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