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For those without comedic tastes, the so-called "experts" at MarioWiki have a real article on Waluigi.
Waluigi

Two Waluigis. Eat them and die!!

A Waluigi is a bad-tasting and often extra poisonous kind of English muffins. The word can also refer to Waluigi, Wario's anorexic little brother (also known as the Wicked Witch of the Wah) who has repeatedly been convicted of criminal stupidity. Waluigi thinks that he is cool, suave, and attractive, but he is really ugly and annoying and doesn't know how to write an 'L'. Nobody likes him, and he constantly whines about it. So far, Waluigi has only appeared in crappy sports shames, but he was also the damsel in distress in Super Mario 128 . Because Waluigi was busy wearing a dress due to his clothing haven been stolen, he was mistaken for Peach and placed in the role. He also had his own shame, Super Waluigi World which sucked incredibly.

Waluigi is probably best known for his big, stupid nose, which, contrary to popular belief, was not stolen from Michael Jackson. He is typically an evil character with a grudge against Luigi. He holds this grudge because, when they were teenagers, Waluigi's girlfriend, Daisy, left him for Luigi.
Waluigi

Contrary to popular belief, this is not Waluigi.

Biography

Childhood

As a child, Waluigi spent most of his life locked in a cold, dark room with no one to talk to. His parents were strict army soldiers who never let him leave the house, placed him on a bread and water diet, and gave him zero freedom privileges. Because of this, he became skinnier than Nicole Richie and even more paler than an Olsen Twin. Scared as a child, Waluigi escaped the first chance he got. He ran away to Nintendo's headquarters in Albuquerque, where they made him a videogame star.

Hiring by Nintendo

During the Videogame War, Luigi's primary enemies were Queen Boo and King Boo. But, following their defeat, Luigi was in need of a new nemesis. So, the videogame designers hired Waluigi, in an attempt to give Luigi a super-cool foe. However, they failed horribly. The designers tried to get rid of Waluigi by putting him in the trash can, but he climbed back out. They had no choice. They were now stuck with Waluigi, an uncool, tall, clunky loser in desperate need of deoderant.

Playing Tennis

Waluigi's first appearance was in Mario Tennis, where he proved that filler characters suck.

Drafted

Waluigi was going to fall into obscurity when he was drafted by the Association of Board Hosts to break the tie on whether or not Horror Land Round-About should have been included in Mario Party 643. Had Daisy never had the shockingly sudden illness (some sources say that it was Waluigi's revenge on her for what happened when they were teenagers), Waluigi would never have become a character in the Mario Party franchise.

A Horrible Dancer

Real Waluigi

One time, Waluigi ate some green cheese and got sick.

Waluigi tried to dance one day, but Wario, who was passing by, thought that he was a horrible dancer and made fun of him. Angry, Waluigi decided to steal the Music Keys to make himself a ladies' man, causing Dance Dance Revolution: Mario Mix. However, he accidentally stole Bowser's house keys. Bowser beats Waluigi up, and Waluigi decided to go back to being a loser.

Kidnapped!

Later, in the shame Super Mario 128, Waluigi decided to put on ladies clothing, probably because he's insecure with his body. While he was wearing dresses, he was kidnapped by the Evil Guy, who thought that he was Peach. The Evil Guy was found and defeated by Luigi and Wario, but Waluigi's was never found. His current whereabouts, whatabouts, whosabouts, whenabouts, and whyabouts are currently unknown.

He returns in the sequal during the fight against Paper Daisy, turning her into a Paper Plane, ending the fight.

Racing

Waluigi appears in Mario Mart as Wario's cart (Yes, Wario rode on him). Although he is the slowest cart, he is very easy to control and when he's off-road he remains the same speed.

In the Fast-Food Industry

Waluigi appears in Super Ronald Galaxy, working for The King and Colonel Sanders. He appears as the boss of the first boss level, Colonel Sanders' Bucket Reactor. He used the four Music Keys (Red, Yellow, Green, and Blue) to fight. He later reappears as a mini-boss alongside Bowser and Colonel Sanders in the final boss level, The King's Restaurant Reactor. However, Waluigi is apparently killed when the Restaurant Reactor explodes.

Working for Obama

Waluigi appeared in Super UnMarioWiki Mascots 64. This time, he was working for Barack Obama. He appeared as the boss of the first level, Political Road. He used the four Music Keys again, this time to hypontized the angry mob of Toads. After he was defeated, the Toads tossed Waluigi off a cliff to his apparent doom.

Love Life

Waluigi fell in love with his girlfriend, Walouise, within a duration five minutes while Wario was speaking with Bowser. Supposedly, these sorts of things happen to him often.

Jobs

His only occupation since he's a idiot is a Zoo police officer. He also saw evidence of Someone who killed a Toad by suffocating it with Blue Cheese.

Gut Suckers Punch out!

The loser Appeared again in the Gut Suckers Punch out! Here HE DOESNT EVEN ATTACK he Soon gets pwned by Gut Sucker

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